My breakfasts are pretty standard and routine. I have a cup of coffee, a banana, and either a bowl of … More
Princess Diana, Pneumonia, and Baby Pandas
I was sick. Really sick. The kind of sick that gets you locked up in Oxygen Tent Quarantine Hell. I … More
The Color Blue, Montreal, & A Toddler Charles Manson
We all have those moments where we are trying not to listen to someone else’s conversation but inevitably get sucked … More
I Got That Justin Bieber Fever. I Would Prefer It If You Did Not Believe It.
I’m not sure when it happened, exactly. “Where Are U Now” was playing like every 30 minutes on the radio. … More
Toothaches And Dental Floss
I am looking for an alternative to going to the dentist. Maybe a Witch Doctor or a Monk who specializes … More
My Phobia Is Totally Normal. Who The F#@! Is Afraid Of Cheese?!
I am deathly afraid of spiders. I am so afraid of spiders that if there is one in the same … More
To The Guy I Kicked On The Train This Morning: I’m Sorry
I am tired. No, tired doesn’t really have the right ring to it. I am exhausted. Like straight up haggard. … More
Living With RBF: A Sad Story Of My Deprived Facial Muscles
Do you suffer from Resting Bitch Face Syndrome? Aahhhhhhhhhh… Gold ole’ RBF aka CBF (Chronic Bitch Face). I would like … More
Damn You St. Lucian Sun!!
Holy Shitballs, why am I still peeling?!?! It has been two weeks since I returned from my honeymoon in St. … More
Taylor Swift Can Help You Break Up With Your Boyfriend
Ok, so maybe this is old news… But I just stumbled across it and I feel it is too fantastic … More